Scare stories about the Internet are most often lead by people who don't use the Internet, have little understanding of how the Internet works, use either anecdotal evidence or outdated research to back up their claims, have little or no understanding of 'risk', do not understand how the Internet benefits its users and, perhaps, want to use the Internet as a scapegoat rather than dealing with the considerably more difficult-to-address or difficult-to-accept real world causes of the problems facing children.

American research (View a discussion of results by the researchers. Or read the research in full.) on the risks to children of online sexual predation has shown that every arrest of a man accused of 'seeking out children for sex online' in the year of the study involved a police officer in a sting. As the researchers said, 'If you go online, pose as a 12-year-old, ask for naked photos and offer sex, you will eventually find someone who will take you up on it. Real teenagers and children, however, are NOT doing this. Teenagers and children use the web to chat with their friends and socialise generally, they do not want to talk to "creeps".' Though the tabloid headlines will have us believe that our children are at dire risk from paedophiles online, the research done on this subject is very clear that the risks online pale in comparison to offline harm, usually family-related.

There have been relatively few cases of child sexual predation initiated on or conducted through the Internet. Research has shown that of the cases that are happening they overwhelmingly involve a post-pubescent teenaged girl who has met an adult online with the intent of having a sexual relationship with him. The men are usually in their 20s and the girls know what they are doing. This, of course, isn't to say that there are not issues with these situations, but it is not "grooming" in the tabloid sense.

The teenagers getting involved sexually with adults they meet online are not representative of the population of young people using the Internet- those girls often have problems in the real world including the use of drugs or alcohol, sexual abuse, home- or school-related problems. 'At risk' behaviour online and offline are correlated.

Apart from the overblown risks of sexual predation online there are, in fact, a few real risks online that should be of some concern to parents.

Online bullying is an issue parents should be very aware of as kids who are bullied in real life at school can now be bullied 24 hours a day. This, of course, can have huge ramifications as they may feel they have no 'safe place' to go. The visibility of bullying on children's Bebo, Facebook, YouTube, etc pages can and should be used by parents as an opportunity for intervention. Most 'internet safety education' for children is focussed purely on the threat of online sexual predation. The fact is, however, that kids just don't see that happening at all. They do, however, see bullying and are not taught how to deal with it. Educating both yourself and your child about bullying is the first step to protecting them.

Pornography and violent content are all things we do not want our children exposed to. More and more, however, kids are creating this type of content on their mobile phones and computers and distributing it themselves to their friends. This is a genuine concern that could, in fact, point to real world issues that need to be dealt with. Parents need to be aware that this is happening quite a lot.

There is ample evidence that pornographic content has not changed much over the history of the Web. The percentage of pornography available online has remained consistent. Unwanted exposure to pornography happens when a child searches for 'the wrong thing' or receives and clicks on some email spam. Social networks and instant messaging are not a contributing factor in exposure to inappropriate sexual imagery online. Because none of the 'child protection technologies' available are 100% reliable, your child may be exposed to something they do not want to see, despite your best efforts.

Perhaps you have seen your browser's search history and discovered that your child is searching for sexual imagery. This can often be a big shock for parents who have refused to acknowledge that their child is 'growing up' and may have begun to be sexually curious. Like bullying, this does not mean that the internet is to blame or makes this worse. It does, however, mean that this aspect of your child's life is now visible to you and can be used as a opportunity to intervene... and forge a closer relationship with them.

For more info on these topics watch the excellent PBS documentary Growing Up Online
Learn more about installing and using parental control software on your computers at home.
Read the excellent New York Times article "How Dangerous Is The Internet For Children?"