Q: I think my child-free friends are being unfair on me. I am the only one who is a mum and sometimes I have to cancel drinks or nights out if my son is ill or, in all honesty, if I'm just too tired. Now my friends are saying that I am letting the side down and it's getting to the point where they don't know whether to invite me or not. I am a working mum and when I explain how tiring this is they just tell me that they work too but can still make it out. My partner says that are not worth it, but what do I do?

A: Until you have a baby, it is impossible to describe how tiring looking after a child can be. It is an undeniable fact that balancing the demands of work; getting a child to and from childcare; settling the child down for the evening and then tackling the evening's chores is truly exhausting.

Some people simply cannot understand how demanding a child can be, but a true friend would empathise with your situation . So, really, you need to ask yourself how good these friends are. Do you really want to associate with people who are unable to understand the challenges you face now that you are a mum? Or are these people too special to you to let go?

If you do want to remain in this circle of friends, perhaps you could approach your nights out slightly differently. Rather than agree to nights out here and there, perhaps you could call the shots and arrange to see your friends on days that you have planned well in advance.

This way you can ensure that any childcare arrangements can be looked after by your partner, minimising the need for you to cancel at the last minute. Additionally, you could treat yourself to an early night the evening before, so that you have the energy to tackle both the day and night that lie ahead.

As well as making practical arrangements, have you actually sat down and spoken to your friends about how they are making you feel? It could be the case that they haven't realised how much this situation is upsetting you. Additionally, running through the pressures of your day may actually help them to understand how tricky life can be with a child.

Whatever you decide to do, don't forget that you are human being as well as a mum and deserve a little more respect and understanding. So don't be afraid to make your feelings known, and you will probably find that the situation will improve without having to sacrifice your friends or your sanity.