Q: I have a seven month old baby who is in nursery five days a week. I returned to work full time when she was six months and decided that nursery was my childcare preference. But some mums I know are saying to me that it's unfair to put a young baby in nursery and that they are much better off in the quieter envrionment of a childminder. My daughter seems very happy but now I am doubting my decision and feel even more guilty.

A: Unfortunately, some people just cannot resist the urge to start judging others on their parenting actions, and this includes childcare. It would be interesting to know if the people who are saying these unkind things to you have ever had a child in nursery, or even viewed a nursery's facilities.

A good nursery will have a separate room to accommodate babies and, usually, the under twos. So it is not the case that your baby will have been thrown into a room with a group of boisterous five year olds! Have you explained this to your friends? It may be worth clearing up a few facts the next time you receive some more of this unwelcome advice.

Secondly, have you explained to them why you selected nursery in the first place? Many parents prefer the larger atmosphere of a nursery and, in addition, there is nothing to worry about in terms of the carers going sick or taking holiday. While childminders can - on the whole - offer more flexibility, you also have to be flexible back and book holidays at the same time and organise alternative care if the childminder is unwell. If you are unable to accommodate those kinds of needs into your working life, then nursery is of course the ideal choice.

Additionally, perhaps you should also explain that you do not appreciate being judged on the choices you are making, and also make it very clear that you are finding these kinds of comments hurtful and unkind. They may have no idea they are making you feel this way, and may even think they are being helpful!

Finally, do not doubt yourself over your decision. If your daughter is enjoying her time at nursery and you are happy with the facilities and the care they provide, you do not need to feel any doubt or second guess yourself. Try not to dwell on it any longer and concentrate on continuing to be the good mum that you are.

Did your baby go to nursery?