By weekend I shall be sterile. My fallopian tubes will be snipped and tied and it's no more babies for us. Unless we get that labrador puppy, but deep down I know that's not the same thing!

The decision was not taken lightly. We have our reasons. Health issues head the list.

During the first six months of my pregnancy I suffered with Hyperemesis Gravidarum. The condition became so serious that at one point the medical team were preparing my husband for the worst: the possibility that he may have to make an unthinkable choice between my life and that of our unborn child.

In the end it didn't come to that, thank goodness. We have been told the chances of a repeat performance with a second pregnancy, in my case, are over 85%. We're not so keen on playing those odds.

Additionally, I suffer from a chronic medical condition that frequently debilitates me to such an extent that I'm unable to function well enough to look after our daughter. In these circumstances my long-suffering but ever patient husband steps in and takes over. This condition could worsen with a second pregnancy.

I am now 40 years old. Not by any means too old to bear children, but I can see that hill clearly and I'm half way up it.

The other issue is possibly more controversial. Notwithstanding the practical elements of our decision, I'm not so sure I can imagine having another child. I didn't want my daughter to be denied the wonder of a sibling relationship, but the thought of starting again from scratch has me running for that hill I'm almost over.

The question asked almost without exception by those we have told, is a tough one. Why isn't my husband stepping up to the plate and having the less complicated and safer procedure himself?

He has his reasons. What should happen if dire circumstances were to intervene in our life? I might get run over by a bus. He finds himself with another woman who wants to have children. What then? Harsh? You may think so. I prefer cuttingly logical. No pun intended. I suspect there is an element of male pride hidden within the pragmatism but I have accepted it. The fact is, men are nuts about their nuts.

So, tomorrow, I shall go forth to render my body barren. I shall do so in the satisfactory knowledge that my husband and I have discussed the consequences thoroughly and are 100% agreed. I shall do so with no doubts whatsoever. My body, my decision.

Still a bit nervous though!


Have you been sterilised? Were you relieved you took the decision?

Read what happened to Suze once she had the operation here.