Dad denied access to his kids because it would upset their mum wins human rights battle
Filed under: Advice and health
PA
A dad who wasn't allowed access to his kids for three years because their mum 'couldn't cope' with seeing him has won his fight to see his children.
Three senior judges said that it was not acceptable for the mother to block the father's reasonable efforts to see his two daughters.
They made their judgment at the end of a legal battle between the unmarried couple who'd had a six-year relationship.
In 2008, the mother left home without warning, taking her daughters, who were then aged four and one, and refusing to let the father see them.
The Daily Telegraph reported that in February this year, the father, from the Swindon area, was banned by a family judge from having any direct contact with his children, now nine and six.
The father was told he could send his daughters cards, letters and gifts once a month, but could not see them because it would be too distressing for their mother.
The county court judge said that she would be 'unable to cope' with the father seeing the children after she broke down in court and said the thought of it made her feel 'exhausted'.
The father's lawyers challenged the judge's decision, saying it had been based on a 'momentary' display of emotion from the mother in the witness box and the views of a 'lone' psychologist, who supported her case.
The decision also went against the view of the independent advocate appointed for the children.
The father's barrister, Sarah Evans, told the Court of Appeal: "It is a fundamental tenet of the law of this country that, save in exceptional circumstances, children have a right to a meaningful relationship with both parents."
The appeal judges accepted that the father's exile from his own children's lives violated his rights. Lord Justice McFarlane recognised that it was 'a very big ask' for the mother to accept that her children's best interests lay in having two parents, not just one.
Where, however, it is plainly in the best interests of a child to spend time with the other parent then, tough or not, part of the responsibility of the parent with care must be the duty and responsibility to deliver what the child needs, hard though that may be," he said.
The process will take place under the supervision of a court-appointed guardian.
The judges urged all separated parents to see the 'bigger picture' and consider the harm that legal disputes cause children.
Wise words on fatherhood
- <p> "When we were visiting New York City, I took my kids to the same playground where I went growing up. It was fun to feel that connection of having gone there as a kid and being there as a parent."</p> <p> <strong>Actor Ben Stiller</strong></p>
- <p> “I cannot understand how I managed to cope without getting cuddled this many times a day.”</p> <p> <strong>Actor Russell Crowe</strong></p> <p> </p>
- <p> “Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.”</p> <p> <strong>Actor Bill Cosby</strong></p>
- <p> “Father’s Day always worries me. I'm afraid I'll get something I can't afford.”</p> <p> <strong>Comedian Billy Connolly </strong></p>
- <p> “I’m preparing for the baby, I’m busy putting childproof caps on all the bottle of booze.”</p> <p> <strong>Talk show host David Letterman</strong></p>
- <p> “There's no pillow quite so soft as a father's strong shoulder.”</p> <p> <strong>Writer Richard L Evans</strong></p>
- <p> “A good father needs infinite patience, boundless enthusiasm, kindness, the ability to score a goal, take a wicket, and hit a winning serve, and the strength to say 'NO' every now and again.”</p> <p> <strong>TV star Piers Morgan</strong></p>
- <p> “A father is the guy who's quick to appear with the camera and just as quick to disappear when there's a nappy to be changed.”</p> <p> <strong>Comedienne Joan Rivers</strong></p> <p> </p>
- <p> “I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it”</p> <p> <strong>President Harry S Truman</strong></p>
- <p> <em>“</em><em>Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.”</em></p> <p> <strong>Comedian and actor Red Buttons</strong></p>
- <p> “There's a time for being a rock star, on TV, and in the studio, but you've got to put time aside for being daddy, and getting chocolate rubbed in your face"</p> <p> <strong>Musician Noel Gallagher</strong></p>
- <p> “Fatherhood is great but there is one problem. She doesn't sleep. At night she seems to turn into a vampire. She wakes up every night five or ten times, asking for things, singing, calling out.”</p> <p> <strong>Tennis star Goran Ivanisevic </strong></p>
- <p> “When the kids have their friends round, I have to pretend to be Fun Dad so they won't go back to their parents and say: ‘He was really shouty’.” </p> <p> <strong>Chat show host Jonathan Ross</strong></p>
- <p> “I cannot reckon of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father’s protection.”</p> <p> <strong>Psychologist Sigmund Freud</strong></p>
- <p> “For a father a home birth is preferable. That way you’re not missing anything on television.”</p> <p> <strong>Comedian Jeremy Hardy</strong></p> <p> </p>
- <p> </p> <p> “Is there any sound more terrifying on a Sunday afternoon than a child asking: ‘Daddy Can We Play Monopoly.”</p> <p> <strong>Top Gear’s Jeremy Clarkson</strong></p>
- <p> “<em>One father</em> is more than a <em>hundred schoolmasters</em>.”</p> <p> <strong>Poet George Herbert</strong></p>
- <p> “I cannot reckon of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father’s protection.”</p> <p> <strong>Psychologist Sigmund Freud</strong></p> <p> </p>
- <p> "I like to dress up as the lead character in whatever story I am reading. This is a little weird because my daughter loves the Disney princesses. But you'd be surprised at how good I look in a ball gown.”</p> <p> <strong>Actor Adam Sandler</strong></p>
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