Alamy
We obviously did, because we now have two sons, and we're crazy about them. But we know family life isn't for everyone.
So I've found myself bewildered at the attitude of some adults if I dare bring up my kids in conversation.
Cue much eye-rolling, sighing and knowing glances, like I'm trying to recruit them into some horrific cult.
These are followed by sly comments like:
"Don't you hate parents who post pictures of their kids on Facebook? How soppy."
"All they talk about is nappies and weaning. Get a life!"
"Why should they get better parking spaces? Bloody cheek."
Are these people threatened? Or do they protest too much?
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Why is having children becoming the one happy occasion in life which has to be suppressed at all costs?
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Last year, I had a part-time job where a pregnant colleague didn't dare mention her impending arrival, until a cynical bunch of workers went to lunch.
Then she'd proudly bring out her scan pictures, and discuss favourite baby names with me.
She couldn't celebrate her condition, without fear of being treated like some child-obsessed freak.
We were supportive while colleagues gushed about their wedding plans, described their diets and everything they'd eaten that day, or talked about their beloved dogs (who they posted pictures of on Facebook). So why were we shamed out of the occasional comment about our kids?
All I can think is that babies are an emotional issue. Some people can't have them. Some are afraid of how much they might change their lives. Others decide not to have them - then feel guilty or judged by society.
Speaking for myself, I can hold up my hands and say: "No judgement". And I would guess a lot of frazzled parents are the same.
We love our kids, but can imagine a life without them – with lots of freedom, extra sleep, spare cash. We simply chose to forego those pleasures for the experience of being parents.
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So why can't we discuss that experience, without eye-rolling or mocking?
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I don't spend my days shouting:
"I hate dog owners who let their mutts poop on my lawn."
"Damn bridezillas. There's more to life than a three-tiered cake."
"I don't care how many calories are in your sandwich. Eat it and shut up!"
Different things are important to different people.
Mum-of-two Shelley works in a call centre, where staff are banned from displaying family photos. She explained: "We have been told it is insensitive to display our kids, in case anyone is privately having fertility problems.
"It's unbelievable. What are they going to do if a colleague gets pregnant? Hide her behind a screen? How far do we go?"
Before we had our boys, my husband and I suffered two miscarriages. And faced the possibility we might never be parents.
I remember the fear, the sadness... and the poor pregnant girl in the office who felt she had to hide her happy news from me.
Even in my misery, I didn't see why she had to conceal her delight. I congratulated her, when I heard about her happy condition.
There are levels of sensitivity and I'm sure pushing a baby into my arms at that time might have been a step too far. But most mothers would know that.
Does the bride-to-be come in for criticism that she might upset her spinster or jilted colleague?
Should the girls loudly comparing calories show concern for the worker who could be on the verge of an eating disorder? No - and nobody would expect them to.
We live our lives, not meaning to hurt others.
So why do mothers get put under the microscope? Accountant Lisa reckons it's the baby bores who ruin it for the rest of us. "One of our secretaries is just back from maternity leave, and never stops going on about her baby – how he eats, how he sleeps, how he fills his nappy," she said. "She used to be so entertaining. But now she talks about nothing else. I try to ignore her, until she starts telling me my biological clock is ticking, and then I just want to scream."
I understand this is taking the motherhood conversation a bit too far. But why do baby bores have to spoil it for the rest of us? We don't allow bridezillas to put us off weddings. The fitness freaks don't stop us going to the gym. There are extreme versions of every personality.
But hopefully they're the exception to the general rule.
Like I said to the last cynic who tutted that he couldn't stand children: "Count yourself lucky your parents didn't feel the same."
More on Parentdish: Why does my child's presence offend you?
Are you fed up of feeling you can't talk about your children without the risk of being told you're boring?
Brilliant baby moments
- Eureka!<p> It's so fascinating to see your little one learn about the world, not to mention her own body. If you're lucky, you might even witness the expression on her face when she realises her hands are attached…and she can use them to bat stuff with! (I witnessed the very moment my daughter realised her feet were attached, when she bit down hard on a big toe.)</p>
- Family ties<p> There will be a particular moment, perhaps not even straight away, and perhaps when you are doing the most mundane of things, when you’ll look at your partner and your baby, and it will hit you for the very first time that you are "a family".</p>
- Making scents<p> You might have heard people talking about the intoxicating scent of a baby's head before and wondered what on earth they were going on about. But take a big whiff of your own little nipper, and you’ll be away with the fairies! No, you haven't just gone gooey – some experts think babies' heads give off pheromones that send oxytocin coursing through your veins (dads, too). Breathe it in, it doesn't last forever!</p>
- Touching moments<p> Feeding your baby is always a great time for bonding, but it's the little unexpected things they do - such as clutching at your hand, pawing your breast (or, as mine did, pinging your bra strap) that make it memorable.</p>
- Getting the giggles<p> Some babies do it early, others make their parents wait and work bloody hard for it… but the first time your baby really laughs from their belly, your heart will sing! Who'd have thought daddy could ever be THAT funny? Seriously.</p>
- Here's lookin' at you!<p> Most babies arrive a bit puffy and spend the first few days with their faces screwed up, trying to make sense of the shapes they’re suddenly seeing. But when those dark eyes actually find yours, you’ll be blown away by the feeling that this brand new little person knows you to your very soul.</p>
- Mini me!<p> Many parents find it easier to see their newborn as an image of their partner - but the first time you recognise a part of yourself in your baby (perhaps a wonky yawn or the way they lift their eyebrows) is a strange, yet lovely, sensation.</p>
- Snooze fests<p> There is nothing more peaceful than reclining with a sleeping baby on your chest: soft little breaths, squidgy cheeks, a perfect pause in time… Zzzz.</p>
- Simple things<p> You wouldn't be normal unless you sometimes missed the old days, when you could drop everything and head out for a night on the town. But the realisation that you really would rather be snuggling at home with your baby than out strutting your stuff makes you feel as warm as the cup of cocoa you're clutching.</p>
- The 'awwww!' factor<p> From hiccupping (seriously adorable) to learning to kiss you back, there will by myriad moments of supreme cuteness. But possibly the biggest "Awww!" will come when you use the bubbles in your baby’s bath to make him look like a gnome (and he beams at you because he has no idea what he looks like).</p>
- Adulation and adoration<p> Who needs to be a superstar, eh? With your baby comes the stupendous feeling of being the funniest, loveliest, most important person in any room. And, of course, you are.</p>
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