The House Dad Chronicles: Is it my job to teach other people's kids to say please and thank you?

Without please and thank you, just go deaf. It's as simple as that. I certainly wouldn't have bought the child an icecream and more fool you for doing it, or if I had I wouldn't have handed it over until the thank you had been said.

This was (to all intents and purposes) a stranger's child so why on earth did you feel so insecure that you felt you shouldn't offend the father.

When I have my grandchildren come stay with me it takes a couple of days to get them into, what I call manners. sitting at the table to eat, please and thank you's, it doesn't take much. I must admit I did intervene when I stayed at my daughter's house and the little one was just getting up from the table, then coming back to eat a bit more. My daughter said that she had read in a book that the meal should be left on the table for several hours for them to eat it, I disputed this so she tried it my way, if they left the table then so did their plate and they didn't get anymore, - they soon got the message. It is a shame the way thjings have gone now - eating on their laps in front of TV. I still hold the rule that a family that eats together, stays together. Very hard in todays way of life with parents working etc., I know, but don't let kids rule the roost. Another lttle thing whilst on my 'rant', where are the 'thank you' notes when you take the time to send presents to people?

When our children had friends round to play, the friends had to abide by our rules when in our house. They soon learned (if they already didn't know) to say please and thank you. So yes there are times when you can teach other children about manners but never in their own homes.

I always encourage children to use manners whether its my own or somebody else's their free and simple to use but get a great response.

Children and childrens expectation levels have contributed to many unruly misbehaved people in our society today. But reality is "We have allowed and contributed towards this decline to Happen" I appall any kind of child abuse but the first step down this road started with the abolition of caning in our schools. This has lead to a decling discipline in society not to mention poor manners. What we sow we Reep" and never is a better example

It does not cost anything for good manners ....i brought my children up with manners and they with thier children ,but i'm afraid if i am not shown good manners by other peoples children i will let it be known.......... or even by a grown up to.if someone barges pass me without an excuse me..... then they also will receive the brunt of my tongue.

Bad manners are a definite no-no.
If a visiting child misbehaves in my house a reprimand is immediate. Mercy is not shown. And if my children misbehave elseware I expect the same reaction.
There is too much easy come easy go in parenting today.
Bad manners must be stamped out.
Many will not accept that their cxhildren are feral animals but correction must be made by everyone.

If our children of whom we own responsibilities for are not well mannered at home or outside, it's a shame on us. We are not worth to be called parent. Some parents have swapped status with their children, parent turning child and child becoming parent. There MUST be set of basic rules of bahaviour for our children. Charity begins at home. Polite correction can be used for the child in question.

MANNERS MAKETH MAN-THE OLD SAYING GOES.AS A RETIRED TEACHER WHO TAUGHT MANNERS TO MY YOUNG CLASSES,AS THEY WERE DEFICIENT IN THESE FROM MANY UN CARING PARENTS,I STILL HAVE NO HESITATION IF I SEE POOR MANNERS FROM LITTLE CHILDREN IN PUTTING THEM RIGHT WHETHER THE PARENTS ARE THERE OR NOT.,OR EVEN DISCIPLINING THEM.WHEN THEIR BAD BEHAVIOUR OCCURS IN A PUBLIC PLACE AND UPSETS OTHER PEOPLE OUTSIDE THEIR FAMILIES,SOMEONE HAS TO TAKE A STAND.I HAVE DONE IT IN DOCTORS` WAITING ROOMS,SUPERMARKETS AND ON HOLIDAY-ESPECIALLY ROUND AND IN POOLS WHEN THE KIDS BEHAVE ATROCIOUSLY AND UNSUPERVISED.
IF THE PARENTS ARE THERE,THEY CAN BE DIFFICULT-"YOUR`E NOT A TEACHER HERE!" I HAVE HAD THROWN BACK SEVERAL TIMES.BUT I DO NOT CARE.IF MORE MEMBERS OF THE PUBLIC WOULD DO IT,PERHAPS THESE CARELESS,AGGRESSIVE PARENTS MIGHT LEARN SOMEV RESPECT FOR OTHERS TIOO.AND TEACH THEIR CHILDREN THAT OTHER PEOPLE NEED RESPECT,EVEN IF THEY DO NOT GIVE IT TO THEIR PARENTS AT HOME.

I was raised by a strict Victorian grandmother. She would give me something when I asked for it and say to me - say thank you. When I asked for something she would say - say please when you ask for something. When I bumped into her or she bumpted into me she would say excuse me, and that is how manners were drilled into me. At meal times at the table I was again chastised. Please, thank you, excuse me was also frequent. When I did not use manners in every situation I got a good telling off. Manners became a habit, and such a habit, as when I nearly miss bumping into people I say sorry, just to be sure I was being polite, as I did not want to be chastised by my grandmother. My daughter's boyfriend'smother remarked on how good her manners were, and stated to her son how well mannered she is. I still uphold my grandmothers Victorian manners, and I chastise children who do not use their manners. She was a tough women to please, and God help any child who did not use manners in any given situation in her house. I do chastise other peoples children if they do not use good manners at my house, or in a public place. I never chastise a child in their own home. It is not my place. Manners is true class status not money. Mr and Mrs, until you are informed to use first names - never call people by their first names unless you are told to by that person. All the money in the world can not buy you manners. It is drilled into by your parents or in my case grand parent, but children are seldom in the company of parents these days long enough, so it is up to the nurseries and pre schools to do the job the parent and grand parent once did.