Surviving Teenagers: 20 reasons why Christmas is difficult
Filed under: Christmas, Is it just me?
Alamy
2. Your mother keeps asking you nip out to the shops for random objects like Sellotape.
3. You're not sure if Father Christmas gives to people who've done their GCSEs.
4. You're going to have to put on an Oscar-winning show of delight on Christmas Day when you find six people have given you a woolly hat.
5. It's possible that no one will remember you need cash.
6. Quite a lot of it.
7. The Christmas tree is nowhere near big enough.
8. It's hard to ignore all the revision you're supposed to be doing.
9. Your best friend has gone to somewhere in Scotland where there's no phone signal.
10. You're not allowed to spend all day playing games on the computer.
11. Your mother keeps asking you to put the rubbish out.
12. Everyone keeps saying, 'So what are you doing these days?'
13. Everyone keeps telling you to wear a coat when you go outside or you'll catch your death.
14. One of your relatives keeps confusing you with a cousin who looks like Gollum.
15. Your mother tells you off for sitting on the sofa watching TV when you could be hoovering.
16. Someone you know has gone skiing.
17. Someone else you know is spending Christmas in New York.
18. The family looks disapproving when they find you in the kitchen with a bottle of beer.
19. Your mother keeps asking you to make cups of tea for your grandparents.
20. You have a sneaking suspicion that everyone else must be enjoying Christmas much more than you are.
Christmas gifts for teen boys
- <p> Morphsuit, from £29.99, from <a href="http://www.iwantoneofthose.com/" target="_blank">Iwantoneofthose.com.</a></p> <p> It’s not clear why teenage boys love morphsuits, but they do (you have only to look at all the weird pictures on Facebook). 100% Lycra with a zip up the back. Apparently you can drink and breathe through them, which is probably an advantage. Available in 17 different styles and colours, including the Tuxedo, the Ninja, and bright green, orange and purple.</p>

- <p> App Toyz App Blaster v2.0, £24.95, from <a href="http://www.red5.co.uk/" target="_blank">Red5.co.uk</a>.</p> <p> The augmented reality top seller returns, but now with a new universal cage that fits all sorts of devices including iPod touch, iPhones and Android phones. Shoot aliens that are coming at you from every possible angle - the game rotates and moves as you do, so you need quick reactions and frantic firing. Dual triggers fire bullets, laser beams and grenades, and there are multiple levels, guns and aliens.</p>

- <p> Socks Are Not Enough by Mark Lowery, £6.99, Scholastic, £4.89, from <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/&tag=aolpdishedit-21 " target="_blank">Amazon.co.uk.</a></p> <p> Described as Adrian Mole meets The InBetweeners, this is the award-winning and laugh-out-loud story of 14-year-old Michael who has a lot on his mind - including the fact that he has just discovered his parents are nudists. Full of lists, footnotes and observations that make you see just how terrible his world has become. Shortlisted for the Roald Dahl Funny Prize 2012.</p> <div> </div>

- <p> </p> <div> Space Rug, £22.49, from <a href="http://www.iwantoneofthose.com/" target="_blank">Iwantoneofthose.com</a>. </div> <div> <p> The intergalactic robe of choice for all aspiring sci-fi fanatics. Yes, it’s a dressing-gown substitute, but it’s also perfect for those days when he wants to slob around in the house watching films full of explosions. Machine-washable, as if he cared, and available in black, white or brown. Maybe buy a light sabre, too.</p> </div> <div> </div>

- <p> </p> <p> How to Bake by Paul Hollywood, £20, Bloomsbury, £8.86, from <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/&tag=aolpdishedit-21 " target="_blank">Amazon.co.uk.</a></p> <p> </p> <p> Co-judge of this year’s Great British Bake-Off. Paul Hollywood is the steely-eyed baker who made all the contestants quake in their plimsolls. Definitely time for all teenage boys to head for a career in croissants - the all-male Bake-Off final attracted over 7 million viewers this year (the X Factor only got a million more…)</p>

- <p> The Prisoner, DVD, 7 discs, £27.99, from <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/&tag=aolpdishedit-21 " target="_blank">Amazon.co.uk.</a></p> <p> Seventeen digitally restored one-hour episodes of the cult TV series from the 1960s, starring Patrick McGoohan, The Prisoner centres on a British Intelligence agent who is kidnapped from his London home and taken to a strange island village where he is made to go through a brainwashing programme. Yes, Dad/Grandpa might want to watch, too, but the series is so old it can pass as retro.</p>

- <p> David and Goliath T-shirt, £20, from <a href="http://www.chicksrule.co.uk/" target="_blank">Chicksrule.co.uk.</a></p> <div> Slogans never go out of fashion, especially if they’re funny.US company David and Goliath hand-print 100% cotton jersey T-shirts with words and pictures that make you laugh. (Some of the humour is definitely InBetweeners. But you don’t have to choose those ones). They’re quite roomy - size small is 36” chest.</div> <div> </div>

- <p> Film poster, around £5.95, from <a href="http://www.easyart.com/" target="_blank">Easyart.com</a>.</p> <div> No one likes staring at a blank wall when they’re learning about oxbow lakes (or maybe checking for updates on Facebook). Huge collection of new and retro images at very reasonable prices - definitely an offer you can’t refuse.</div> <div> </div> <div> </div>

- <p> The Amazing Spider-Man PS3/Xbox 360/PC/Wii/DS , cert 16+, from £18.99, from <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/&tag=aolpdishedit-21 " target="_blank">Amazon.co.uk</a> and <a href="http://www.play.com/" target="_blank">Play.com.</a></p> <div> Following on from the new Spiderman film this summer, this is a game with scale, pace and playability that’s ideal for those who want to save Manhattan from mutant hybrids and super-villains. Experience spider-like gymnastics as you plummet from skyscraper to street. </div> <div> </div>

- <p> Zombie slippers, £19.99, from <a href="http://www.firebox.com/" target="_blank">Firebox.com. </a></p> <div> He just woke up and is feeling a bit brain dead? What could be better than a pair of super-comfortable plush zombie-head slippers, complete with elasticated heel and dangling eye-ball attachment. One size, fitting up to a men’s size 10.5, so he might have to shuffle if his feet haven’t grown yet (although that would look very authentic).</div> <div> </div>





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